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♔ Tuesday, September 12, 2006
9:07 PM |
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ni hen ai ta..
i got the song! dumdedee :D
i guess i can understand. but sometimes, i wish yall would be more objective. i dunno. i guess when you dislike someone, whatever good that person does will not seem to reflect much in your eyes. but this is bad.
okay. there's corporate filming tml and the day after. full u. hais. okay. the bad thing is it ends in the evening and i'll reach home late. meaning lesser time for revision. but the good thing is we get released from lessons earlier(: yay. but anyhow, i think the whole thing is a waste of time.
i was doing work in steffi's class with her yesterday. and she started asking me what cca meant to me now. a bit sad but cca to me doesn't really mean anything anymore. [it cannot be compared to those days when we were still cadets.] aiyee, am i supposed to instil that bit of self-discipline and sense of urgency in myself? i guess i am. maybe it's cos we no longer have to change and share the wet and dirty toilet with everyone and see everyone chionging to get changed into full u and getting paraniod. cos we have the sj room.. talking about self discipline, i know i'm lacking it man. i admit i do play around during cca sometimes [sighs, like who doesn't?], but you know something? when i start to get real serious during cca, i just don't feel like it's me.. hais. whatever me man.
i don't know why but i feel animosities everywhere. yes, constantly. no matter how well you hide, how well you disguise yourself, i know it's there.
RAHHS! i was thinking.. if only there was someone out there who can relate to me. who knows how i am feeling, who knows what i'm thinking, whom i can tell almost everything to and tells me everything.. how nice. but it's very rare to find such confidants. maybe one in a gazillion? haha i dunno.
aiyee, things just aren't the same anymore. not anymore. not anymore. not anymore. not anymore. not anymore.
